frustration

I read a quote recently that said something similar to: "A good job in parenting means raising the child that you have instead of raising the child that you expected to have."  That doesn't make sense when I read it back but it was something like that.  Whatever it was, it made me stop and think.  You always picture your child as an extension of you, but without all your bad qualities.  Obviously, this never happens.  And, in my experience, it can be hard - really hard - when your child isn't like you at all in certain areas.

Harrison is shy.  And, timid, and quiet (except around us).  He is very, v-e-r-y slow to warm up to new people and new situations.  For instance, today I took him to his first (in a long time) swim lesson.  The lesson was 30 mins and we got there right on time.  Which means that he didn't actually get in the water until 35 minutes later and he basically missed the lesson because he refused to get near the class.  That was really, REALLY frustrating to me.  Especially since we are paying for that lesson that he didn't get.  I can't really relate to him when he does this because I don't remember being like this (correct me if I'm wrong, Mom) and I get mad instead of empathetic.  But, I knew deep down that this would happen and I did attempt to get him there early to get him acclimated to the new situation.  I also know deep down that he would benefit from a private lesson more but it is 4 time the cost of a group lesson so that option is out.  The point is that this is my child - for better or worse - and I need to accept it and learn to deal with my own frustrations.  The positive side of this attribute is very positive.  I met with his teachers this morning for a parent teacher conference and they LOVE him.  I'm sure that they say that to every parent but I got the sense that they really and truly do.  He is quiet (a teacher's dream, and again, only in school), and very, very sweet; and he is respectful and minds well (school, again).  I will take that over a loud mouth, smart-alleck any day of the week.  And he is sensitive.  He gets beaten up by his 17 month old sister but just because he won't hit or bite her back.  And he loves his family.  He says almost every day that we are his best friends and that he "loves us - so much."  I love my shy guy, SO much too.

and, just to lighten this post up,  I thought I'd post these pictures of his dad.  Drunk after his surprise 40th birthday party.  Maybe he gets it from him??